Bye bye Dose!

I heard about this guy for a few times from a close friend P. After hearing a lot, I met him once and it was probably just a few hours that I could interact with him. It was at my friend P's wedding.

At the wedding reception, I walked up and introduced myself to him and when he told his name is "N", I remarked, so you are HIM, eh. He chubbed back - so they already told what a lunatic I am. He was busy getting tipsy and also trying to get the lone white girl also tipsy at the party. Such charms, one should admit. After 10 minutes, while he walked past me, he introduced himself again - "Hey I am N". When he reminded him that we've just met, he quipped, "oh, but you dont really have a remarkable face to remember all that". I guess it didnt matter to him to introduce yet another time.

He was the fresh air of the party, which was held on a stuffy summer evening. When someone else misplaced their keys, they readily blamed that he lost it. He looked every nook and corner of the hall for almost an hour, yet at the same time trying to stabilize his tipsy self dressed in primed suit. People relaxed when he was there and it almost seemed like croaky frogs also wanted to sing.

That night when we headed home, he became the home. Even the hostess felt like she was invited to her own house. He knew where the vodka was, where the last slice of veggie pizza was and also knew which girl he loved and which girl he'd "only rather have anal-sex with" too. I chuckled at that, because those were probably the words that I might say too. People only pretended to ignore him, but only to be pulled deeper and deeper into his reality. Amidst all this, he still pulled the shotgun and gently prodding his over-worked friend to go have a comfortable sleep. He knew (just like we all did) that she wanted to stay there and listen his overtly-unapologetic-sexual-ramblings (but, the imagery was quite vivid). However, his friends comfort was on his mind. Apart from her, no one else were spared. How else would you picture him striking a pose of a tortule thats getting sodomized? At first people blinked their eyes, but the tears of laughter rolled for hours after that. Even though I was the one who is taking the living room couch, I never wanted that fun to end. I braved my droopy eyes, but it had to end.

Wait, it actually didnt. After all the lights were off, he crawled up the stairs with a glass of vodka and entered into room where "M" was sleeping. He woke her up and made her chug the darn thing. I thought the girls were beating him up, but the loud thud that I heard was him falling off on stairs. There were laughters again, but he couldnt really care.

The next day morning was a complete different picture, only more drastic. This body of no buff refused to put on a shirt and roamed around everywhere he could. He rufused to eat the dosas or anything for breakfast, but as luck has it, the hostess had her way and managed to convince him eat some toast. He compared the smell of cheese on the bread to dogs pee. When I asked him to pick up the banana from the fruit basket, he publicly announced that he doesnt want my banana.

I left to meet another friend in this city, but with a promise to meet them all during lunch. I said a casual bye to him, but never got to say a proper good bye. He didnt give me a chance to that anymore. He sucked, and sucked some more, of every person's rigidness that he met in his life. Such people come with a rarity tag attached. They are like those designer brands, specially made to order, to enlighten everyone's spirits around them. Mr. Dose was one such rarity.

Those words arent accolades, those were as much factual as water and earth. I dont have a younger brother and never wanted one, but if I had a choice, he would be the it.

After all this, I didnt cry for him - because I know he would say, "why the fcuk are YOU crying for me". He got me shut up quick, but how the hell can I console his other buddies - now, take this Mr. Cool! I dont like you one bit, and you are never getting my banana!

Also, PRAY tell me why cant I get some sleep even at 5:15 AM!!